Dig for this treasure – find a fulfilling life!


We have often talked about the desire that parents have for their children to grow up to be safe, healthy, successful and happy. In our process of doing everything we can to make that possible for our children, there are times that we forget or put on the side our own desire to feel fulfillment and balance in our life as parents. We are people too! And as individuals sometimes we make choices that are not in line with who we are and what we value, just to get things done.

Every choice we make has an impact on our lives and that of our children. It takes courage and commitment to make choices so that we feel fulfilled and balanced. So many things come up that create barriers, pressuring us to make quick decisions without having the time to think about how it might connect, contribute to or upset the balance of life.

If there is one thing I have learned about a balanced, fulfilling life, one that is full of meaning, purpose, and satisfaction, it is that it is not about things or even accomplishments. We cannot fill the gap in satisfaction with a better job, a bigger or smaller car, a special vacation. Living a balanced fulfilling life is available every day of our lives, just not by filling our life with things. Nor is it just about feeling great all the time. Some of our most fulfilling moments are when challenges have been faced and we have struggled and worked through them, coming out stronger. You may have been there and felt a sense of inner peace for living what you valued.

Fulfillment in life is about being whole, complete. It comes when our actions and purpose, mission, vision are aligned. Connecting our vision for ourselves and family with actions that use our talents and gifts – all aligned with our values, living our highest virtues, making choices and raising our family so that our children learn to make choices also based on being their best selves.

  • What would it take to be fulfilled?
  • What is your vision
  • Who are you becoming?
  • What are your top three values that guide your choices?

Begin the process of creating a balanced and fulfilled life.

  • Take your time and make a list of what you value.
  • Rank them and choose your top three.
  • Then ask yourself, “Which values show up in my choices? Which values do I sometimes neglect?”

Would you like the help of a coach? I can help you find the treasure of clarifying the values that will guide you to a fulfilling life. While I have worked with parents and children for over 20 years I am now taking a course for accreditation with the International Coaches Federation (ICF) at Anne Arundel Community College and part of the process is to account for 100 hours of coaching, both paid and unpaid. I’m still on the unpaid part.

I would love to coach you. Learn more here.

Set up an appointment here: https://calendly.com/joevandeuren

Life Skills: Integrity To Our Personal Values

Teaching character and life skills to students

Being true ourselves is part of having integrity.  When we think about integrity we also think about honesty.  In fact if a person is honest they are spoken of as having integrity.  We can count on them to be true to their word and we have a trust factor that is very high.

Just as important as honesty with others is, so is honesty with ourselves.  Are we honest about who we are, what we like, how we act both with others and with ourselves?  Are we honest to our values, morals and ethics?  Especially in the tween and teen years we are very worried about fitting in and having friends.  In times like that we may be afraid that others may not like us or laugh at us if we do not like, act, dress, talk the same way that they do.  Yet being ourselves is part of feeling good about yourself.  Lets look at an example.

Lets say you are in school and your group of ‘friends’ start talking about someone else not in the group. They may be a new person at the school.  They decide that it would be ‘funny’ to play a prank on them or to say something mean to them, and you are chosen in some manner to be the one that plays the prank.  Now you may not feel comfortable to do that, in fact it goes against everything you are as a person, but you are feeling the pressure of the group.  What will you do?

Here is a what Professor Dumbledore told Harry Potter:

“It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends.”

Being willing to stand up for what you believe in and who you are, takes courage and is what integrity to yourself is all about.