Throughout history in the business world we have seen some great partnerships. Many times one partner was the visionary and the other one was the nuts and bolts person / investor – who knew how to get things done and make things happen. Nonetheless as you look at this list we can be sure of one thing – together they had a vision that they agreed on and they could all see exactly what they wanted to accomplish.
Thomas Edison & J.P. Morgan & Vanderbilts (commercial power companies)
Wright Brothers (air plane)
Sam, Jack, Albert, and Harry Warner (Warner Bro. entertainment)
Coco Chanel and Pierre Wertheimer (Perfume and more)
Guest Post By Tom Callos for Balanced Life Skills. Mr. Callos is Mr. Joe Van Deuren’s mentor, coach and instructor.
You didn’t start your study of the martial arts to “go through the motions” of it all, did you? Of course you didn’t, but look around you in your next class and I’ll bet you spot a number of your classmates doing that very thing, going through the motions. It’s human nature to get distracted, to multi-task, and wander off course.
To deepen and strengthen your practice so that you stay on the mark and make reasonable progress, I offer you these 10 time-tested, Tom-tested tips:
1. As often as you can remember to do so, say to yourself “I am aware that I am training” (kicking, punching grappling, or whatever it is you’re doing at the moment). For me, that never fails to get my head out of the clouds and back into my practice (I am aware that I am writing this!).
2. Use a training partner (or partners) to hold you accountable to more intense, more focused, and more “present” practice. Friends are a good thing.
3. Eat better food before and after ever class (and, of course, that translates into ALL THE TIME). If you’re body’s jammed full of food-delivered chemicals, cups of corn-syrup, and crates full of unnecessary carbs or fats, you’re going to find you don’t function like the well-oiled machine you’re supposed to be. Contrary to the way a lot of people live their lives, what you eat IS important to your performance. In fact, what you eat IS self-defense.
4. Breath deeply, focus on breathing deeply, think about breathing deeply, and maybe, if you have a habit of forgetting, write “BREATH DEEPLY” on the backside of your hand. To see just how much this helps you, do it. You’ll feel the benefits right away.
5. Take your practice off of the mat. Courtesy and respect for others isn’t something that’s practiced in the school with people you’re semi-afraid of. It’s for that ding-dong at the supermarket (you can tell what someone is made of by how they treat the people that mean nothing to them). It’s for your Mom, who sometimes bugs you in a big way. It’s for the substitute teacher (yes, even for him/her).
6. Practice at home, a minimum of 10 minutes a day on the days you don’t attend classes. Little things add up, so even 10 minutes of practice can help you grow. Oh, and if you don’t think 10 minutes matters, try to hold your side-kick out out for 10 minutes or try and hold your breath for 10 minutes. Yeah.
7. Read age-appropriate philosophy. Champions, whether in science, baseball, chess, jiu-jitsu, or cross-country skiing, all have belief systems that make them rise above hardship and overcome obstacles. They all learn to cope with defeat –and victory. Reading the words of someone with experience can be the next best thing to talking with them face-to-face.
8. Go crazy. Yes, act in a way that most people would consider very odd indeed. For example, when things start getting really hard, you pretend they’re getting easier. Crazy! When everyone else complains –and for good reasons too, you find the good in the situation and jump up to be the first person to turn whatever is wrong, right. Insane! When everyone else quits, you stick to it! You’re a nut!
Actually you are a martial artist
9. Measure your own personal performance on a scale between 1 and 10, with “1” being your worst performance –and “10” being an all out, focused, beautiful-to-behold effort. Try to operate as close to level 10 as you can during your classes (whether you’re standing still or doing difficult maneuvers). And while you’re at it, try to LIVE at level 10, whenever possible. It’s a good thing.
10. I hate to drop this one on you last, as it’s a bit of a let-down after all this glorious focus on you and yours, but maybe the best way to deepen your own practice of the martial arts is to help others deepen theirs. Yes, that’s right, in the end, it’s not about you at all. Funny how it always works out that way.
Tom Callos
About the Author: Tom Callos’ bio and project portfolio may be read at www.tomcallos.com
Guest Post By Tom Callos for Balanced Life Skills. Mr. Callos is Mr. Joe Van Deuren’s mentor, coach and instructor.
I took my first martial arts lesson at age 9. By the age of 13, when my friends were experimenting, when peer pressure seemed at an all time high, when I just knew my brain power had far surpassed my father’s, and when I couldn’t pass any reflective surface without gazing in wonder at what it beheld, I was firmly and deeply entrenched in my identity as a martial artist.
The classes anchored me, in fact, they were just about the only place where I could stand completely still for any extended period of time (except, of course, if front of the TV). The instructors emphasized respect, courtesy, and a code of honor that nobody else I knew seemed to care about. For me, that was good. It made me feel unique.
In a good martial arts school, your child will feel like a part of “the team.” And this team, if they’re good at what they do, will have daily talks about compassion, about respect for self and others, about kindness, and about non-violent conflict resolution.
But equally as good as the philosophy can be is the fact that your little one will be training, as in legs flying, rolling, punching, blocking, jumping, and spinning. Each maneuver has an effect on your child’s brain and, of course, their body. When I watch the young people in my classes doing what we do, I always think about how good it is that they’re here, doing something so constructive and positive.
I also reflect back to when I was a child –and that’s usually followed by a silent “thank you” to my parents.
Football, soccer, baseball, tennis, and guitar were all fun, but not one of them affected me as my martial arts lessons have. If you’re a parent, I would highly recommend enrolling your child in a good school –and you might even consider some classes for yourself.
Tony Robbins once spoke about why some individuals do not have continued success once they gain a measure of success. It was likened to a thermostat that allows the heater to work, but when it reaches a pre-destined level, then it shuts off. Why is it, that some find themselves unable to sustain, and in fact sometimes fall apart completely? It can be fear of success, or it may be as Dr. Steven Berglas suggests, a lack of bedrock character.
I have found it interesting as a parent / leader that the very beginning of parenting many times makes us feel so successful. We get the compliments of many who tell us what a great job we are doing and how great our children are. Then as one psychologist said, “Every parent must morn the death of their perfect child.” One day we are shocked by something they do or say and we wonder where did that come from? No matter what, it happens to all of us, some sooner – some later.
One thing is for sure though, having great character as a leader / parent is important. All of us must continue to examine our personal character, matching our words and actions, as this is the most important asset that we have in business or family. If we say we are going to do something – do we complete it? Are we there for our children in their moments of glory and disappointments?
Children, our own children know us better than virtually anyone else. They know the real us, even if we think that we are doing a good job of putting up a great face. Without a word being spoken, I have seen them recognize when dad has lost his job, or parents are not getting along well. They feel the emotions, they know the character and we as parents cannot disguise who we really are as leaders. Even more important they are learning as they watch us and developing their own character, many times copying their parent / leaders actions – not their words. As a parent leader our character is our most important asset.
Reinforcing character building in our children is one benefit of the martial arts at Balanced Life Skills. In the month of February we will be discussing FAIRNESS with our students.
Guest Post By Tom Callos for Balanced Life Skills. Mr. Callos is Mr. Joe Van Deuren’s mentor, coach and instructor.
This is an article full of shopping advice. If you’re shopping for a martial arts school, for training, then you’ve come to the right place.
I’ve been studying the martial arts for 40 years, I’m a 6th degree black belt in taekwondo, a 17 year practitioner of Brazilian Jiu-jitsu, and my students have include national taekwondo champions, karate point-fighters, and mixed martial arts legends. So, when it comes to martial arts training, in every –and any –realm, I know (exactly) what I’m talking about.
There are so many promises made by individuals and groups saying that they will make your son or daughter a leader. In fact one school in Pennsylvania claims to be the best school in the country for creating leaders out of any female student that comes to their school. While leadership skills can be learned about from a classroom – true leadership comes from doing and can only be measured by the amount of influence you may have earned.
Your circle of influence will grow over time, but only if you are able to demonstrate certain things in your own life. First you must have good character that is recognized by others. Second you must build relationships with others. Third you must know your subject that you are trying to have an effect on. Fourth, having good intuition for the next right thing to do. Fifth a certain amount of experience. Sixth, what have you done in the past. Seventh, what are your abilities?
Now anyone can start their role as leaders, but should start with small projects and then use the knowledge, experience, intuition and success they have to go on to larger projects. That is the reason we encourage our young students to do small projects like doing acts of kindness and then getting others to join with them in doing acts of kindness. Some of our students have on their own and then with others played musical instruments at senior homes, or set up hot chocolate stands and used the money for the Lighthouse Shelter.
These are the beginning steps to larger projects in the future where they will be able to use their good character, relationships and experience to influence others to join them in accomplishing good for their community.
Throughout history in the business world we have seen some great partnerships. Many times one partner was the visionary and the other one was the nuts and bolts person / investor – who knew how to get things done and make things happen. Nonetheless as you look at this list we can be sure of one thing – together they had a vision that they agreed on and they could all see exactly what they wanted to accomplish.
