Author: Joe Van Deuren

You most probably have heard of the acronym S.M.A.R.T. applied to goals.

• S – Specific
• M – Measurable
• A – Agreed upon or accountability
• R – Realistic
• T – Time bound

With  physical training instead of “I want to improve my pushups”, it may sound more like, “My goal is to be able to do 20 pushups on my toes by February 15, 2014.”  This goal is not general like “getting stronger”, but rather it is specific. It is measurable, the number is 20 pushups. For it to be agreed upon you may want to get a coach or friend to help you. It is realistic, this can easily be reached, even if you cannot do any pushups right now. The goal is time bound – Feb. 15, 2014 is when you will test yourself and be able to say objectively  “Yes I reached my goal or No I did not pass the test.”

We can apply the same test with other goals we may have dealing with work, community service, relationships. Make a list of your goals for 2014.  Are they in agreement with your values? Will they fill your most critical needs?  Are they S.M.A.R.T.?  By answering these questions you will be far more likely to complete your goals or decide that they are not good choices for you at this time.

With tomorrow being New Years Day many will be making resolutions and setting goals for themselves. I was thinking about why we set goals for ourselves and decided that really it is about finding ways for us to grow. Growth is one of those spiritual needs that each of us must fill to feel fulfilled.

For us to set a goal that we have any chance of reaching, the goal must also be a way to meet one or more of our emotional needs, either short term or long term. Those emotional needs that we all have are a need for certainty in our life, variety in our life, significance or love/connection. If I set a goal of losing weight we might ask ourselves – what need am I filling if I do lose weight? Am I filling the need of certainty (certain of what?) or maybe it is significance or greater love or connection?

Then what is it that I set a high value on in my life that losing weight will give me certainty that I am living that value? Is it showing love for my family, my health, my children or receiving love/connection? Without filling a value and meeting at least two of our needs it is likely that our New Years Resolution will not be kept, even forgotten with a few days or weeks. But when 2 or more of our needs are being met, it is far more likely that our goal or resolution will be followed through on to it’s completion.

All goals must also be SMART.  Next a look at creating SMART goals.

Each month we will discuss a life skill with all of our students. This month the word is Goal Setting.  This word will be defined in the following ways for our students.

 

 

Young students: Goal-setting means: “I made a plan to achieve my goal!”

Older students: Goal-setting means:   “Deciding what you’d like to achieve and making plans to achieve it.”

Each age group has a worksheet that parents can use to continue the discussion at home with their children, and one for adults to allow them to think more deeply about the skill and how it applies to them. Would you like to receive the worksheet? Stop by our studio at 133 Gibralter Avenue in Annapolis, MD and tell us the age of your child. We will give you a worksheet and invite you to watch Mr. Joe discuss the word with the students in class.  You can also follow our discussions here on this website.

If you would like to become a member of Balanced Life Skills, come TRY CLASSES FOR FREE.   We are not your typical martial arts school, in fact we are an education center, working with our students on physical skills along with empowering families with compassion, awareness and respect. We believe in every child and build their self – confidence.  Balanced Life Skills takes part in community service and encourages each student to do the same.

Come in and talk to the parents that are here and watch the class for the age group you are interested in.  Learn about the Balanced Life Skills Way.