Author: Joe Van Deuren

Leading by example, it’s something we try to do for our children in many different areas of life. In a way, by doing this we become a leader as we direct the way for our children. Something that your children may not be aware of is that they can be leaders as well, leaders of kindness, and this is something that you can not only support but encourage.

In this world we need individuals who will step up and guide others in the positive aspects of life, one of the most important areas being kindness, as kindness is the promoter of peace. So how can your children be kindness leaders? Through demonstrating kind acts to peers they are leading the way, they are showing their friends how easy being kind can be and what an impact it can have. By helping a classmate who has too many books in his hands to carry, to helping a smaller child find his way to a classroom, these are examples of kindness and can occur spontaneously as random acts of kindness as your children see opportunities.

As you display random acts of kindness in your life, your children notice. Encourage your children to do the same and let them know when they do something kind, their friends notice as well. To encourage kindness, let your children take the lead so they can truly be leaders. Let them come up with ideas while you support their ideas. By doing this, letting them come up with the ideas rather than telling, you are giving your children confidence as kindness leaders.

After your children come up with some ideas, come up with some ideas for yourself, ways that you may be able to show acts of kindness. Ultimately each of you can share these acts of kindness after they happen. And what a joy it will be to watch your children light up as they discover for themselves what it means to lead others in kindness, making the world a better place, one small act at a time.

Kindness, one of the most important things in life, is a critical attribute to instill in our children. Kindness is about creating a culture of peace, it is our greatest self-defense as we negotiate relationships, it is almost palpable and makes a huge difference in all of our lives. Children get their first glimpse of the world from their parents. Home is the place that forms the foundation and the place where parents have an opportunity to help shape their children into kind human beings.

When teaching children about kindness there are several different areas that you can focus on:

Give examples of kindness – Talk to your children about sharing with their classmates and friends, after all kindness is the key to friendships. Discuss ways they can treat siblings and parents with kindness by helping out around the house.

Notice and give appreciation for kindness – When you see your child exhibiting kindness acknowledge the behavior and give praise in whatever way your child appreciates. Whether a simple, “good job” or a big hug, let them know you notice their kindness.

Model kindness – As we know our children see everything even when we think they may not! As adults we can model kindness in many different ways. Hold the door open for someone. Treat the earth with kindness by recycling properly. Speak kindly to your spouse even during a disagreement.

Allow your child to be the recipient of your kindness – Sometimes we rush through our day and forget to show kindness to the people we love the most including our children. Helping them with homework, and giving them advice about how to handle life’s trials display kindness. You can also remind them from time to time as you do these things how these actions are examples of kindness.

In the end, when children understand the importance of kindness and exhibit kindness themselves they will see how good it feels to be kind to others. When you help someone in some way it brings joy to the “giver” as well, and whether your child is 4 years old or a teenager they get it. So do your best to teach your kids about kindness, and feel that joy in your heart as you witness your children’s growth in an area of life that means so much to so many.

Each month we will discuss a life skill with all of our students. This month the word is Kindness.  This word will be defined in the following ways for our students.

 

 

Young students: Kindness means: “I use caring words and gentle actions!”

Older students: Kindness means:  Showing care, concern, and consideration for others without expecting anything in return

Each age group has a worksheet that parents can use to continue the discussion at home with their children, and one for adults to allow them to think more deeply about the skill and how it applies to them. Would you like to receive the worksheet? Stop by our studio at 133 Gibralter Avenue in Annapolis, MD and tell us the age of your child. We will give you a worksheet and invite you to watch Mr. Joe discuss the word with the students in class.  You can also follow our discussions here on this website.

If you would like to become a member of Balanced Life Skills, come TRY CLASSES FOR FREE.   We are not your typical martial arts school, in fact we are an education center, working with our students on physical skills along with empowering families with compassion, awareness and respect – creating a culture of peace. We believe in every child and build their self – confidence.  Balanced Life Skills takes part in community service and encourages each student to do the same.

Come in and talk to the parents that are here and watch the class for the age group you are interested in.  Learn about the Balanced Life Skills Way.