In every characteristic we discuss we always end up with the thought that we as parents and role models must model the behavior that we would like to see in our children. But with tolerance we will begin with that concept. Our very first step is to examine our own prejudices and stereotyping beliefs. None of us have grown up without being affected by this.
Even if we are not aware of them, in some way our children see through all of that and can see these communicated attitudes. (usually quite unintentionally) To begin with don’t try to determine your own prejudice, examine what you saw as a child in your parents. What were some of your parents prejudices? Now when we have that list, examine yourself – Do any of these remain with you today?
Take time to reflect on how you may be projecting them to your children. Then take the steps of tempering them so that they do not become your children’s prejudice.
Building Tolerance in our children
Tolerance is our new word of the month and is a virtue that will help our children and ourselves to get along in the world. Tolerance can be taught. One author I read as I looked at this subject tells the story of being in the airport and seeing a large group of children with a t-shirt on that said, ” Children Are Not Born Racist.” How profound. We are not born intolerant, we learn it from the environment that we live in.
I grew up in a home where though there was not any overt intolerance that I remember, it was subtle in the way things were said and some feeling of superiority over certain races. This amazes me now, since I realize how poor we were, how little we had, yet there was this air of superiority due to skin color. There is a Native Indian saying, “Your actions speak so loudly, I cannot hear what you say.” If we are going to influence our children in regard to tolerance we must practice what we preach and preach what we practice.
Over this month I will have some clear cut things we can do for ourselves and our children to learn and practice tolerance.
Gift Wrap Project
Last night we took a group of students and parents to the Sheraton Hotel to do gift wrapping with the Jr. League. For the second year in a row now we have wrapped gifts for the 234 foster children in our county so that they will have a holiday season that will bring some joy to their lives.
With 3 to 4 gifts contributed for each child by the citizens of AA County, it is quite a chore. But with all that we have learned on the mat in our martial arts training about focus and discipline we were able to complete all the wrapping in just one hour. Here are some photos from our evening.
Holiday Safety Tips
From today thru next Monday there will be new post on our Be Safe site on holiday safety tips. Be sure to check them out and feel free to send a link to your friends so everyone of us can enjoy a safe and happy holiday.
Be Safe Annapolis
About CNN Heroes
Last night I watched a good portion of the CNN celebration of Heroes in the world today. They were all ordinary individuals with a vision or idea of a way to help a single person or a group of individuals one at a time. None of them believed they were heroes. All of them were leaders.
There was one of them that really struck me with a comment she made in her acceptance speech after receiving an award. She said, “It is quite a comment on the world when showing respect for or doing an act of kindness for someone is deemed heroic.”
I would agree with that. For us to be leaders though there are skills and knowledge needed along with being able to look at situations and see what we can do to make a difference. Our acts of leadership do not need to be so large that they affect every human on the earth. In fact if we start with that goal in mind we are less likely to be affective. We can change the world of individuals and those around them. When we are willing to help one person soon we find that we are affecting so many more.
In our own community we have heroes. I will comment on some of them in the future. But I believe that our children have that ability too if we develop it. This is one of my goals for this year coming in 2009. You may want to follow my Leadership Blog and look for some training sessions we will be doing this year coming up. If you are interested in your child learning the skills and getting practice to be a leader, contact me at Balanced Life Skills and lets see how we can do this together.
Tolerance
Young students
Tolerance means: “Even though we’re different, we can all get along!”
Older students, teens, adults:
Tolerance means: An attitude of openness and respect for the differences that exist among people.