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Vision: What if our vision needs to be changed?

We have been talking to all of our students about using vision, visualization, or imagination to see themselves accomplishing a goal that they have set for themselves.  Using all of our senses to make it as real as we can in our head.  Most of us have played a game or sport that we pictured in our mind  that we were up to bat in the 9th inning with 2 out and the bases were loaded, or a scenario in basketball, football, tennis, swimming or other activity.  We can create the feeling of  the pressure as we make the shot or swim the length of the pool. It becomes very real.    That is vision.

What should we do though if the vision we have is filled with thoughts of fear and doubt.  If we only see ourselves failing, falling down or not achieving?  This would have a negative impact on our success, and we would likely not do as well as we wished.  So what can we do?

We need to change the vision.  Yes we need to go back and remake the movie in our mind.  If we are having difficulty in seeing a better result, it is within us.  We may not be seeing beyond the ‘limit circle’  that we have created around ourselves.  If we will permit ourselves to push beyond the limits we have set for ourselves, to visualize larger opportunities and possibilities and achieving them, the more power we will find in ourselves to accomplish our desired outcome.

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Will your child succumb to peer pressure?

By the time a child reaches third grade they are fully aware of the comparisons and assessments being made of them in everything from social skills and personality to physical appearance and athletic ability.  They are at a real crossroad in their early lives where their self esteem is either built or broken.    They now have a choice to make as to whether their decisions will be made from an internal direction or if the choices they make will be based on external influences.

As parents / leaders we too have to consider how we are leading both our personal and professional life.  Are we trying to impress others in order to influence them, or are we focused on who we really are, not trying to be perfect in the eyes of others or the center of attention.  If the example we set for our children, in our personal life is – saying, wearing, and driving the right thing, having the right job and social status or the example we set in our professional life is – struggling to get ahead, looking out for number one, working long hard hours to make the credit card payments – our children notice.

Children will see it in our words, actions and feelings and they will also feel the pressure to follow suit.  Always trying to impress others is hard work.  Both personally and professionally those who are leaders attract others to themselves by focusing on others rather than themselves.  They ask questions, listen and don’t try to be the center of attention.  Being the leader in the family, setting this example will produce children that will make decisions based on internal directions – morals, values, and ethics – rather than being influenced by outside peer pressures.  Is that not how we want our children to really make decisions?

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Vision: Action with Vision makes positive difference

How important is it to have a vision of the goal you have set for yourself?   Here is what one person said about this subject, ” Vision without Action is a dream.  Action without Vision is simply passing time.  Action with Vision is making a positive difference.”   Having a vision of where we want to be or what we want to become is really an appeal to better ourselves and possibly influence others to do the same.

The vision we create in our mind will engage all of our senses and will become very real to us and this becomes an assurance that we will reach our goal can be seen and felt by others around us.  Vision can even have an affect on others to help them reach their goals and by creating their own visions.  To be the best at visualizing we must use all of our senses.

If we can imagine it, we will be able to not only see it happening in every detail, we will also be able to feel, hear, smell and taste it too.  Take the time to think about what you would like to see from yourself in both the short term and long term, and on a daily basis create it in your mind as a reality.  Doing so will affect your commitment to your goal.  Seeing it in your mind will make you believe it to be possible.  Believing it will assure you can achieve your goal.

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Seeing the big picture

Leaders in an organization think about decisions based on the large picture and the impact that they will have on the people in the organization and if it fits within the mission of the company.  As parents and especially if we have more than one child we need to look at our decisions and the effect they will have on the entire team.

I have seen some families that have made decisions that were great for one child in the family but disastrous for others.  For instance if you have decided to send your children to a particular school.  The atmosphere and method of instruction may be perfect for one and not so good for another.  One sport may be a perfect fit for one and not so good for one of your other children.  Making decisions that benefit the entire team is what leaders / parents do.

As a leader / parent we understand how our family is going to work the best for all members and for the good of the community.  What can we do that will benefit our family as individuals?  How does it fit into our community of friends, school, church or other organizations?  How does it relate to each individual member of the our team / family?  Some activities and individual preferences may need to be put on hold for the benefit of the bigger picture.

So here is the question we can ask:  What positive improvements can you make today based on your understanding of your family missions and values?   What impact will it have on other family members, community members and globally?

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Parents & Leadership: Focus on what you can do.

When I think about excellence in leadership one of the persons that come to my  mind who was able to achieve excellence in his field and from his team members was John Wooden.  What he was known for was stressing excellence to his players, working hard and doing so to reach their highest potential.   This is an important lesson for leaders in the work world and in parenting.

Our children, if we have more than one, will all be different.  One may be the easiest child to be around.  They listen, accept correction, work on making changes that we would like to see in them.  Then we have our second or third child and they are oh so different, and we are at a loss.  What did we do different, why are things so much harder with this child? Continue reading “Parents & Leadership: Focus on what you can do.”

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Parents are Leaders: Value Your Team

When individuals feel like they are making a difference at their workplace, or when they have an impact on a life when they are volunteering for a non-profit, it makes them feel valuable and gives meaning to the time they are spending on a project or for a company.  In this series of posts on leadership and parenting we are making comparisons between the two.

As parents it is important to realize that our children need to feel like they too are making a contribution to the vision and goals of the family.   As you are building this important team, our family, Continue reading “Parents are Leaders: Value Your Team”