Our children are met with so many confusing messages for them and keeping secrets is one of them. We want our children to know how to keep a secret, how to be loyal to a friend who has entrusted them with a personal thought or feeling. At the same time as adults we know that they can be asked to keep things secret that they really need to talk to an adult about. It may be about one of their friends who is considering doing something that is not safe, fair or even lawful. Even more so, some adults may
Today we asked in regard to loyalty – What if some one was being mean to another student? What would you do? Virtually all students said they would ask them to stop, take the target away from the mean person or tell a teacher. Unfortunately research shows that not to be true. Most children will internalize the event and be very concerned about being the next target. Loyalty to your friend is difficult during a time like this. If we talk to our children about loyalty, and role play with them what they could do, or be comfortable doing they
Today we asked an interesting question to our students about loyalty in the classroom and their schools. What if you saw someone writing in a library book or on the walls in your school? What would you do? The comments went from telling them to stop it, asking them to stop and then be more firm about it, to telling the teacher. The courage it takes to speak up for what is the right thing to do can only be taught from their own personal sense of right and wrong. How and why they stand up is just as important.
We first learn about loyalty from our family. Our family is the closest relationships we will ever have, and so we can understand that if there is a breakdown in the relationships, a break of loyalty, that we can be affected for a very long time – not knowing who we can trust. Our children will learn in the family what it means to always be there for someone and how to stick up for someone who needs a friend by the way they are treated in the family. Each member of the family, by keeping their promises, by not
Loyalty is another one of those qualities that we hope that we see in our children, loyal to their family, friends, and teammates – but at the same time loyal to morals, values and ethics that they have been taught by us as parents and teachers. This can be tough for adults and children though. What if our friend is making what we believe are bad choices, is it OK to speak up or is that tattling? What if the culture in our school seems to be allowing bullying? How can we speak up to our teachers and classmates and